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Friends and Love

Date: 23rd of May 2007
Time: 0145 hours
Listening to: Ireland - Of Legend And Lore (Robert Smith)
Current mood: Lost and disillusioned (Wordpress is down, so I can't blog in mine)

[...] how love feels is definitely much to the individual's taste and liking.

Just so you know, I've just completed five out of six exam papers and my last one isn't due until this Saturday. So, I have about three days to catch up with Geology. The last examination I had was Statics of Rigid Bodies, and I must admit it wasn't an easy exam at all. Not that the examination was hard, but it was because we could not really comprehend what our lecturers have taught. Somehow, we found it quite hard to understand too many different ways of solving a problem at one go.

Nevertheless, I'm not here to bore you about my examinations. As far as I'm concerned, once they're over, they are really over. There's no use thinking about them at all.

I've been watching the 23rd episode of Heroes (that's the last episode for the first season), and a few scenes struck my mind. I've also been chatting with a university mate whom I've not been meeting for quite some time, and we spoke about how things have generally gone wrong this semester.

The first thing I'd like to talk about is love. In Heroes episode 23, there is a mention about a person who is able to love unconditionally. It strikes me that all of us are able to love someone, but how many can love unconditionally? You can interpret love as love between a guy and a girl, sibling love, parental love, love between friends, whatever type of love you like, but how many of us can claim that when we love someone, it is unconditional? That means there is no particular expectation or perhaps even preferences from the other parties? It's almost impossible. No matter how much we love a particular community or individual, we would definitely expect something in return. Let's take a love between a guy and a girl as an example. When both individuals fall in love, you would expect the other party to stay faithful and loyal, wouldn't you? It might not count as a condition, but let us take that as just a small example.

I have a few people asking me what love is. To be honest, I cannot really tell you what love exactly is. It is not something that everybody feels in common, meaning to say different people view love in a very much different perspective. We know how is it like to feel happy, sad, disappointed, but how love feels is definitely much to the individual's taste and liking.

We could say that love is a strong emotion where it does not involve a single individual, but at least two or more. Love is often followed by interest in that particular community or individual, and as the saying goes, love is often blind. Yes, no matter how sound your mind is, when one is in love, your vision is blinded. You cannot deny me that, especially those who have been in love. So, here I leave you with all your thoughts about love. Much has been said in a lot of our posts on love, and I've got a lot to say about this subject. I've written three posts on it in my blog: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 (proves how much I've got to say about love) and it is all based on my opinions purely. You may or may not agree with me.

Moving onto another topic now. Most of us have already moved into a new phase of life: life of a student pursuing tertiary education. In other words, most of us are already in college or university; some of us have already started our undergraduate studies (Jared, Joe, I Brian [Gungrave1988], Albert [Comrade Cripple], etc.) and we are bound to undergo some adaptations in life. For those whose university is far from home, or those who live within the campus, friends are like the second family. I don't know how you would view your friends in university if you are living within the campus, but to me, friends are like my second family.

I'd say they're like my second family because it is friends whom I would turn to for just about anything, whether I need advice, help, or just to talk. You couldn't imagine your university life without friends, could you?

So, what is the main purpose of having friends? In fact, what is the main role of a friend? Is it just to keep each other company? Is it just to share problems? Is it just for social purposes? Is it to ask for assistance when one is in trouble? Is it to be there for you when you are down, upset, betrayed, etc.? Well, it is pretty much so, but to me, a friend is more than that.

But in my opinion, a friend is one who is able to change your life.

Most of us would not think highly about friends because they are just like people who co-exist with us and work together with us. But in my opinion, a friend is one who is able to change your life. Whether you like it or not, at some point of your life, you would feel that friends mould your personality. People say that parents do most of the moulding. True enough, but we (friends) have the tendency and even ability to be more influential, and a lot of people tend to exemplify their friends, emulate them. Friends can also determine who you really are.

But there comes a problem when one cannot determine which friend is loyal and which is not. There are some friends who even tell their close ones that they will not desert them no matter what the circumstances are, or that if their friends fall, they would either pull them back up or fall together with them (the "If you drown, I drown with you" kind of attitude). Yes, even I have said such words before, but to the many of those who utter such words, how many can keep them?

The main dilemma to a lot of people would be to tell apart which friends are true and loyal ones and which are not. That only you can decide for yourself. There are many friends around you, and you alone have the capability to tell apart true and loyal friends from the not.

So, what is a true friend? Or who is a true friend? In my context, a true friend is one who cares about his friends and is not afraid to tell people the truth, even though it hurts like a double-edged sword. I appreciate friends who are daring enough to tell me what wrong have I done straight in my face. Sure enough, I'd be hurt by such words, but knowing that they are kindly intended, give their words some thought and you would be hurt no more. Besides, better to hurt me and bring me back to reality than to let me continue suspend in the world of fantasy, isn't it?

As a friend, I believe that I have a very important role to play. I treasure my friends very much for my circle of friends is particularly small. My principle in friendship is to maintain a "How can I help you?" type of attitude. I love my friends just as much as I love my family. I feel that my friends are equally as important. Besides achieving academic excellence in university, it's friends who are keeping me alive; it's friends who are also giving me the reason to study in where I am now.

All these are just my two cents worth. Any difference in opinions are much appreciated in the comments section.

Date: 23rd of May 2007
Time: 0350 hours
Listening to: Kiss of a Rose (Seal)
Current mood: Indifferent (Wordpress is finally up.)

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